Where are you Christmas?

I literally heard this song for the first time the other day.....& cried.

It may not have been the first time I heard the song but it definitely hit home. I've known since October that we wouldn't be able to drive out to Cali for the holidays. I guess in the back of my mind I thought family would drive out to us but in reality that would be insane. So here we are, 8 days away from Christmas & not only did we leave our decorations in Paul’s car (which is currently in Cali) but along w/all the decorations we left behind our stockings. :( As pathetic as these little things may seem they sure do take a toll.

Thankfully the holiday spirit finally got a hold of me, shook me like a rag doll until I realized how truly blessed I am.

My family & friends are healthy.

We have a warm home to go to.

My brother is on leave & home for the holidays.

My dogs give the best "welcome home!!! where the heck have you been?! did you know I can do this *dances in the air, throws toy across the living room, runs from one room to the next?!!!!!* reaction that anyone could ask for.

We have a stable job. Yes, our hours have been cut but it can always be worse.

& the best part of all? This time next year we'll be celebrating with Cameron.

Yes, that last thought should always come to mind when I'm feeling down but I'm human & I have my weak moments.

For the past couple of years Paul & I have gone to see the infamous Christmas display in Rancho Cucamonga with my two younger cousins, Kira & Jacob. This would be the first year w/out seeing these two faces Ooo & drool over every hot chocolate, churro, tamale, blinking santa sold at every other house.

We were always mistaken for their parents but we are far luckier than my aunt & uncle. We spoiled them rotten, dropped them off w/a sugar high & at the end of the night we’re the good guys. ;)

So this year we went to Tempe Lake to see a boat show. It was fun to see how people decorated their boats & even some canoes with Christmas lights. But what really caught my attention were the children. They were having so much fun. It was truly bittersweet. I caught myself wishing Kira & Jacob could have been there but knowing that's going to be my little Cameron next year made me smile.

Since I found out I was pregnant I've been writing in a journal for Cameron. A few days after Thanksgiving I wrote that the complex we’re staying at put a flyer on our door asking for toy donations for their Toy for Tots drive. I thought that this would be a nice tradition to start & in the following years Cameron can chose the gift to give him a better understanding of the true meaning of Christmas. So this year we picked out a Littlest Pet Shop……thing. I don’t know much about the “rooms” or editions. I just know Paul’s niece loves them so I figured we couldn’t go wrong. Even though it was nice to participate I would have liked to know who the toy went to. Hopefully whoever she is enjoys her little pets.

Then after work last night we went to the local mall. Weird how we haven’t been to a mall since moving out here (a crime I tell ya). On a quest for new shoes for Mr. Paul we passed by a booth for The Salvation Army. Beside the booth were two Christmas trees adorned with tags labeled Christmas Angels. Each tag had a childs name, age, sex, clothing sizes & a short list of toys they’d like to receive. I can’t remember my age but when I was younger my mom use to receive assistance from the Salvation Army. Mainly for food but I couldn’t help reliving those moments we would drive down to pick up our boxes of donated food. As odd as it may seem I don’t know the last time I thought about those times.

I knew I wanted to pick a name. The people who donated to our family didn’t know us. Without those giving hearts who knows what we would have done for Thanksgiving dinner or dinner of any kind for that matter.

It didn’t take much but reading aloud a child & their wants to Paul before he was on board too. Since we already gave a toy that was girl appropriate we decided we would search for a boy. I wouldn’t be surprised if we were there for over an hour. It was really overwhelming reading each card & trying to decide who we would pick. I mean really? Who are we to say that this child is more in need than the next? I don’t’ know why but every once in awhile we would read a list out loud & either laugh (they’re so darn cute) or say aww (ok the aww was more me but Paul would politely smile). After our long search Paul finally found our boy. He’s a 9 year old boy named Manuel. His list of toy wants included race car or Lego’s, or other building toys or games.

He had me at Lego’s.

My cousin use to have this travel case full of Lego’s & whenever I would go down to visit I made a bee line straight to the case. I built for hours & I don’t know if my mom couldn’t afford Lego’s or because my brothers were so much younger & might choke on them but I never got Lego’s. The appreciation for them went farther than playing with my cousins. K-mart at the time had a Lego’s play station where the parents left their kids to build while they shopped. Needless to say shopping at K-mart was a huge highlight of my childhood. Not only because of the Lego’s but because I always went with my grandma.

Since we left with the “ornament” I catch myself thinking about Manuel & wondering what he looks like. How does he dress? Would he want a sweater too? A new pair of jeans? I mean toys are a must but what about a tee saying “I love legos!” hee hee ok that may be a bit too much.

Times are hard right now. Paul & I have been bargain shopping & even gave each other a budget this year. But we didn’t hesitate to do with out or stretch our dollars even further for this little boy.

Even though the pamphlets state that “you’re an angel to these children” Manuel is truly my angel. Thank you Manuel for bringing the true meaning of Christmas back into my heart & thank you to the Salvation Army for giving me the opportunity to bring Christmas into Manuel’s home. We look forward to searching for a name again next year with Cameron. :)

Christmas survey

I should probably blog this after Thanksgiving...eh.

1. Wrapping paper or gift bags? Paper if I'm being nice. Bags if I'm being lazy.

2. Real tree or Artificial? After Pauls "allergy" mysteriously disappeared we went from fake to real.

3. When do you put up the tree? I'd say 2 weeks before Christmas.

4. When do you take the tree down? When our floor is covered w/dead needles.

5. Do you like eggnog? Ew no.

6. Favorite gift received as a child? I remember singing "I've got the power!" after opening my TMNT Nintendo video game.

7. Hardest person to buy for? So far this year I'd have to say my Uncle Paul & Nino.

8. Easiest person to buy for? Myself.

9. Do you have a nativity scene? Nope.

10. Mail or email Christmas cards? Mail.

11. Worst Christmas gift you ever received? Lol I'd rather not say.

12. Favorite Christmas Movie? I will stop dead in my tracks when The Christmas Story is playing.

13. When do you start shopping for Christmas? When I get that "oh shit" moment & realize Christmas is right around the corner.

14. Have you ever recycled a Christmas present? That's so evil. I should have. Hee hee

15. Favorite thing to eat at Christmas? Aw man. I'm going to miss being home. L

16. Lights on the tree? Yup.

17. Favorite Christmas song? I like a lot of them.

18. Travel at Christmas or stay home? Stay home.

19. Can you name all of Santa's reindeer? Yup.

20. Angel on the treetop, star or…? Star.

21. Open presents on Christmas Eve or morning? Well usually it goes Christmas Eve-Eve for Paul & I to open gifts. Christmas Eve w/brothers & Christmas w/family.

22. Most annoying thing about this time of the year? Trying to find the "perfect" gift.

23. Favorite ornament theme or color? Our tree is red with silver but I don't really have a favorite. My aunt collects santa claus ornaments. It looks nice but that would freak me out.

24. Favorite for Christmas dinner? :( Paul is stuck w/my cooking this year. Poor Paul.

25. What do you want for Christmas this year? A glider w/ottoman.

26. Most favorite Christmas Tradition? Opening presents on Christmas eve-eve & eve. I really like baking & going to see the lights. But I don't know if those are traditions.

It's that time of year again...

We headed out to Petsmart last night for the pet costume contest.

I'm lame & didn't take pictures of the other contestants because:



1. We have a camcorder now.



2. Sadie would not stop whimpering for her ball.



3. Oscar would stop walking every 2 seconds because the sleeves on his costume were too long.



4. Let's be honest. The other animals weren't nearly as cute as our babies.



Enjoy the pics!

Happy Howl-o-ween from Sadie

And the rest of the Jackson crew

P.s. Yes that's a picture of a picture. Bite me.

Yay he loved it!

This past Sunday was Pauly's first Fathers Day. Even though Baby J hasn't arrived he's very proud of taking care of me & keeping up w/around the house. I have to say that Paul is the absolute best. When I first met Paul I loved how attentive & respectful he was to me. He'd open doors, get me a plate of food (gasp! the man serving the woman!) & even cooks. He cooks people! Thank you GOD for sending me a good man. :) Even before we found out I was preggo & was going through my weird sleeping phase (oh wait I'm still there :/) he would clean the house, take the dogs out & help out in any other way he could. I know he's going to make a terrific father & teach our baby EVERYTHING about sports. Oh help me.........touchdown? That's good? I thought that was illegal if you were underage? Oh my I have so much to learn.

The morning started off w/presents! I bought him The Expectant Father. He's been reading my pregnancy books so I thought one directed toward the daddy might help him understand why I'm psycho & cry all the time. :)

I was really excited to see his reaction of the photo w/his daddy but I didn't realize he'd be so shocked. After pulling away the wrapping he started to cry. :( awwwwwwwww it was so sweet. Oscar was so worried about his daddy he jumped up to give him lovings (lots of kisses). After awhile he finally just sat & stared at the picture. It's amazing how pictures can do that to you. You just want to stare & take in every little detail. Which of course he did. We talked about Bill, how cute baby pauly was & how much hair brother Jeff had. hee hee The ride also made some changes. It was all very nice & interesting to see his reaction & our reaction to the picture together. :)



After opening up gifts Paul made pancakes. MmmmmMmmmm I've never been a big fan of breakfast. It's always grossed me out. Apparently Baby J loves breakfast! Every morning I have to have either cereal, bagel, pancakes, you name it I want it. Doesn't sound like anything out of the ordinary but a read meal before 11 a.m. is unheard of. The new craze is hash browns. Oh the glory of the fried potato. Mmmmmm



Then it was off to Barstow! Good lordy that was a long & HOT drive. We haven't been out there for so long I forgot about the miles & miles of desert scenery. We finally approached the cemetery which was actually pretty busy w/visitors. The last time I had been there was right after his headstone was placed. So that tells you quite a long time ago. I've mentioned to Paul that we should go visit but Bill was the first person (family-wise & that he was very close to) to have pass away. That's seems so un-real, lucky & truly sad all in one. So he wasn't too keen about visiting the cemetery. When we first arrived it was really sad because well it's a cemetery & two his headstone was covered in weeds & just looked a mess. :( Nobody had been there in awhile & you could tell. So what did we do? We headed to Wal-mart for gardening tools & a special surprise for Bill.

Pinwheels just ooze w/happiness don't you agree? It was nice to spend time w/Paul & "talk" to Bill. I told him since we made him look pretty he had to watch over Baby J. Deal? Deal ;)

Can't wait to visit soon Bill!

xoxoxoxo

Happy New Year!

Now this isn't going to be a post about some random NY resolution that I won't keep for more than a day but some randomness that occurred just 2 days into the New Year.



While walking to my car this morning I found a Guess? checkbook wallet near my car. I picked it up, threw it inside my Michael Kors purse, started the car & headed to work. Now completely swamped at work w/annoying co-workers that are either lazy or complain too damn much (or a bit of both) I completely forgot about the lost checkbook wallet.

During lunch I went into my fab purse & there it was.....just begging me to open it.

So I did.



Oh my. It's so interesting to go through things that aren't yours. Yes, that's right. I love going through random belongings. Medicine cabinets beware.

So to those of you that enjoy the same bizarre randomness that some call their own treasures, enjoy.

*Please note this is not an actual picture of the wallet I found. A recreated version has been displayed to protect the innocent.

I finally found a contact number for Ms. Guess? & found out (even though her ID states otherwise) she actually lives in our complex. I'm returning the found items.......but until then here's a glimpse into her life wrapped up in a 7.5" x 5.5" x 0.5" checkbook wallet.

1. Identification Card (she was born in 84 & still doesn't have a drives license)


2. Member cards galore! Blockbuster, Bebe, ClubBev!, Styles 4 Less


3. Random business cards : Verizon, Trashy Lingerie, Light & Adult Entertainment ranging from limo services to Adult services, Make-up artist (should I give her Jens number?) quite a few djs & an attorney.



4. One dollar bill & 4 pennies


5. Receipts smashed into the side pocket :


L.T. Entertainment $1200.00


CVS Pharmacy $ 3.12


Chevron 50.00


Subway 8.78


Motel 6 54.49


T-Mobile 200.00





Finding a way to contact the owner..........Priceless.

Seriously if good karma isn't a great way to ring in the New Year I don't know what is! Hopefully Karma rewards me with a new wallet I've had my eye on for at least a month now. :)

Here's to a fab New Year!

5 more days!

Can you believe it? Only 5 more days until Christmas. Geez louise, on top of the fact that I only have my mother & two presents for Paul down I'm stuck in wonderful Quartzsite, Az. Blech. The fact that there's a cold named Quartzsite Crud should be description enough! But let me recap on our lovely trip out to Sacramento :) Before Pauls mother moved from Barstow to Sacramento we would spend Christmas Eve, eve at her house. Now that's she's made the move out to live closer to Jen (sil), Jeff (bil) & the girls. So, off to Sacramento we go! We flew out. I hate, hate flying. It freaks me out. So bad that I get really clammy & have to talk to myself to avoid screaming & running up & down the aisle. :/ It's really quite pitiful.

Jen, Myself
Camille & Alexis

Pauly & Jeff

It was nice to see everybody. It's really weird to have family so far away! I'm huge on spending time w/family. I hate to miss any type of event. Which, happens often since my work schedule is so wacky. So here we were spending time w/loved ones but I had a constant thought stuck in the back of my mind.

Would I be ok living out here?

Paul threw his hat into the ring when a position for Parts Mgr was opened in Davis, Ca. The mgr there now put in his two weeks. He's older & wants to start his retirement. The fab part of his decision is he wants Paul to replace him. When Paul called (he was at the Davis store) & told me Al's decision I instantly cried. Ok, so yeah I'm a huge cry baby but I couldn't help it! I was so proud of Paul. He works so hard. He deserves this. So why am I freaking out? Bottom line : I'd miss my family terribly. The upside is we won't be too far away. Paul already knows this move would be hard on me & even though we don't know a definite answer he's been really supportive. Which is why, I would move in a heart beat.

So back to our visit! We landed pretty late Thursday night so the girls were already in bed. On Friday, Jen & I headed out to the wineries. Mmm the wineries. It's not every day I get buzzed before lunch! After visiting a few (or a handful) of wineries we headed out to lunch. Jen & Jeff are members at a local winery & can visit every Friday for free lunch. Not only was it free, but it was delicious! I had a fab cranberry, white grape salad w/lots of yummy fresh bread. Jen had the same salad w/meat pasta on the side. I have wonderful pics but of course they're at home. Where I'm not :( Later that night we had "our" Christmas. Judi & her boyfriend (:p) came over to open presents w/the rest of us. I finally got my bluetooth! Now this may not be exciting to you but I've been traveling alot & holding a phone up for 4 hrs straight is NOT fun.




On Saturday we were a bunch of bums. After watching I Now Pronounce You Chuck & Larry we headed out to Leatherby's. It's was so delicious. I had Bart's Black & Tan (substitute vanilla ice cream w/vanilla frozen yogurt). If you're ever in the area check it out! Each glass is overflowing w/chocolate or caramel syrup & the whip cream is so fluffy! Yum!
Afterwards, we headed back home & played a Cleopatra. Now I usually hesitate to play w/Jeff. Both Jeff & Paul are highly competitive & dealing w/inpatient people makes me cranky. But I obliged & it was actually quite fun & there was very little bickering. Which made me a happy camper. :) Even though I never won :/ Afterwards, we watched Jackass the movie. Seriously, watch it. It was so hilarious to see what crazy stunt they attempted (& succeeded) to do. My favorite was Mouse Trap.


On our last day :( Sunday we went out w/Judi & Steve (:p) blah, blah, Elephant Bar, blah, blah, met Judi's neighbor who was actually quite charming, blah, blah then they drove us to the airport & we headed home!


We arrived home on Sunday (!) & I drove out to Quartzsite on Monday morning :( So I've been stuck here since! I hate it. I hate that I'm so far away from home & the highlight of my day consists of watching TMZ. It's horrible & I hate it.


At least I did hate it.


Today we had our Christmas luncheon. Now, normally I dread luncheons. I usually end up eating bread & chips. However our chef remembered that I was a veggie head & made side dishes especially for me.

I feel so loved & stuffed! I guess, I don't hate Quartzsite. Maybe dislike is a better choice of word. However, please do not for one second think I'm not ready & looking forward to getting the heck out of here! :)

Did you know?

What the word FAMILY means?

Father And Mother I Love You

Now I don't know if this is true but I thought it was pretty interesting. I'm so glad to be done w/school (at least this semester) to spend some quality time w/my wonderful family. Mainly Paul. I've been so busy w/finals & traveling for work that we haven't had too much time together. This past Sunday I took a break from final projects & wrote out all our Christmas cards. Paul met w/our photographer earlier this week (finally!) & picked up our pro pics. They came out fantastic! I'll be sure to share some pics soon but until then here's a quick peek at our Christmas cards & a glimpse of a final project for my fashion illustration class. Enjoy!

I love the way they came out!

Sooo a little insight into one of my final projects. For my fashion illustration class we had a choice of lingerie, gown or swimsuit line. I obviously chose to create a swimsuit line. We had to create the line & include an inspiration board along w/fabric swatches. I had a fab time w/this project! I was especially excited when I found my last fabric swatch. I swear you wouldn't think it would be so hard to find white velvet but it was! I ended going out to Joanns in Montclair! But I had to pass by on my way to school so it wasn't terribly bad. Besides they give their fabric samples out for free! I usually pay 30 cents a piece!

My teacher enjoyed my line so much she asked me to create a croquis board! It's basically a colored version w/sketched models. I can't wait to get started & receive the extra credit (of course).

Is that snow?!

Nah, this is California. In California we celebrate 90+ degree weather during the holidays. Unless you live in the mountains then you get snowed in. Not sure what's the better option. My fab friend Robyn asked people to post their favorite holiday memory. Wonderful idea. I didn't realize I had a favorite memory until the question was asked. Immediately I thought of last year. But first here's an insight on my twisted family. It's a Montiel tradition to make My grandma (yes MY grandma) cry at every birthday, mothers day, Christmas basically any event that has to do with presents or cards the person to make my grandma cry (to the point where she can't talk) is crowned the "winner". Please note, I did label us as a twisted family. However, we don't go out of our way.

My grandma deserves it all.

Nobody really goes "out of their way" to outdo one another but it's always nice to see who/what touches my grandma to the extent of crying. Which most of the time is a card. Oh how my grandma loves cards. :) My grandma has a hard childhood which consisted of foster & orphan homes so she truly does appreciate any little gesture. I won a few years back with an awesome pair of concert tickets to Tony Bennett. Score Grandma! Now with that in mind we really don't attempt this with one another. That all changed last year...

As always my brothers Phillip Richard (Jeremy :( was away in Iraq) & my mom came over to spend Christmas Eve with Paul & I. We always open our presents on Christmas Eve. Everybody sits around in a circle & we take turns opening our gifts. I really hate it when everybody opens their gifts all at once. You miss the reaction! I'm all about the reaction. So as always Paul played Santa & handed Richard one of his gifts.

Myself, Richard & Phillip

Now Richard is beyond amazing. He truly is & I'm not just saying that because he's my brother. Well, not solely. He has so many amazing qualities. He's not selfish. In fact it goes beyond not selfish. He's very practical. If he doesn't "need" it he doesn't want it. Silly boy. It's like pulling teeth when asking him what he wants or if he wants anything at a store. He just shyly smiles & declines. So that of course makes me crazy. To add Richard has other amazing qualities. He plays the trombone (which by the way he taught himself to do) how, you ask. Well when he joined band the instructer asked what instrument he wanted to play & Richard chose the trombone. Why, the trombone? Because it was the only instrument he knew the name to. :/ Now he plays trombone solos. He also enjoys everything & anything that has to do with Science & Math. Once we were on our way to the Aquarium & he calculated how fast I needed to go in order for us to get there in a hour (98 mph). Crazy boy. To top off his obsessions is good ol' Zelda. Zelda has been in our family since the old school Nintendo system. Richard use to watch us play & when it came time for his turn he use to play with the controller upside down. I'm tellin' ya. The kid has talent. Ok I'm losing focus. So he has endless love for Zelda & all it's magical glory.

So every time a new Zelda game is released Paul & I faithfully visit the nearest game store & purchase it for Richard. So back to my favorite Christmas memory. Last year we were taking turns opening gifts & it was Richards turn. We wrapped the game inside a box so he had no clue that the game was inside. As soon as he realized it was the "new" Zelda he looked up with tears in his eyes & wrapped his arms around me & said, "oh wow THANK YOU!" It made everybody else tear up & comment on how touched he was at our gift! It was such an amazing moment.

Ahhhhh, the Montiel tradition lives on.

I can't wait to see what this year brings ;)

Christmas, Christmas time is heeeereeeee

I'm so over Thanksgiving. Ever since I became a veggie head it hasn't been the same. The only food that keeps me happy are the croissants. Truly sad. Besides they're already playing Christmas tunes on the radio so I'm obviously not alone on this one. Then to top it off my sub-conscious told me it was Christmas time through my homework.

My teacher had to point out the design was suppose to focus on plaid. What can I say? I LOVE shoes. Plus it really completes the outfit if I do say so myself. ;)